Things We Will Always Remember

I loved my Grandfather, Guy W. Gentry, and my Grandmother, Sue Tapscott. They were affectionately known to us kids as "Poo and Grandaddy. Tonight, I am posting a letter, authored by my sister Becky, to her two daughters, Erica and Ashley.


Dear Erica & Ashley,

I want to tell you a story about your Great Grandparents, Poo and Grandaddy. Erica, you had a picture on your refrigerator of a couple, you cut it out from the newspaper. It was their wedding picture from 50 years ago and you thought they looked so cute and you wanted to be friends with them. I am enclosing a picture of Poo and Grandaddy which I believe was taken before they were married or soon after. They were so cute and always happy. I want you to know about them.

When Poo was 18 years old she won a scholarship, in piano, to the Conservatory of Music in Chicago. They would put these on in small towns and give scholarships to young people. When Grandaddy found out she had won the scholarship he asked Poo to marry him. He didn’t want to lose her to the big city or anyone else. They married and soon after she was pregnant with my mother, Louise. Poo was 19 years old when Mother was born. She did not carry another child to full term until she had Uncle Rick, some 20 years later. Consequently, my mother and her brother are 20 years apart with no children in between. My dad used to love to tell the story of taking Rick, when he was about 2 years old, into the Drug Store and sitting at the soda fountain. The man behind the counter commented on the cute son he had. Dad said, “This isn’t my son, this is my brother-in-law.”

In fact, the reason that we called her Poo was because she didn’t want to be called Grandma or Granny or anything like that. She was too young for those names. She wanted to be called Momma Sue. Well, Tim knew she wasn’t his Momma, so he dropped that part and Sue came out as Poo. That is how she became Poo to all of us. It was a big deal for her to let your friends call her Poo. It always made her mad that Dad called her Poo. She would say, “I am not your Poo!”

Poo was absolutely the most fun person I ever knew. She laughed and laughed until tears ran down her face on a regular basis. When Mother was pregnant with Tim, her water broke and all Poo could do was laugh. Mother said they went to the doctor’s office and Poo couldn’t even talk, she was laughing so hard. Needless to say, Mother was not real happy about this but she said everyone in the doctor’s office was laughing. Laughing can be so contagious.


It was always fun to go to Poo and Grandaddy’s house. Grandaddy had his office in what had been the garage. He always ate lunch in the house. He would have a ham and cheese sandwich, cottage cheese and peaches and milk. We kids always got to have Coca-Cola at Poo and Grandaddy’s. This was during the time that Coke bottles were very small. At home we would have Coca-Cola but when those 6 bottles were gone, it was gone. Also, we often shared a bottle with someone. When we went to Poo and Grandaddy’s we could drink all the Coca-Cola we wanted and if they ran out, Poo just went to the grocery store, T Norman’s, and got some more. One time when we were visiting Danny went into the bathroom to wash his hands. Poo said, “Don’t use those guest towels over the toilet.” Danny replied, “Poo, don’t you think I know how to act in a fine home?” A fine home is what they had.

One day when I was 5 or so, Poo told me when she was born that her name was Molly Sue, not Mary Sue. She had changed it because she didn’t like the name Molly. I told her I did. I promptly named my favorite doll Molly. I remember her distinctly. She had short, dark hair. I always wanted her to have long hair. Mother told me that if “we” cut my hair it would make it grow faster. Huh?? I cut Molly’s hair and it didn’t grow at all.

When I was probably about 8 years old I remember doing somersaults in Poo’s bedroom with Danny and Debby. Poo told us not to do that in the house. Danny said something about how she was just jealous because she couldn’t do one. She immediately got down on the floor and did a somersault. Then she told us that we had to go outside to do any more. We never could get her to do another one but we laughed and laughed.

When I was about 9 or 10 years old, Grandaddy went out and on his own bought Christmas presents for all of us. He bought me an Around the World doll. She was from Ireland and he told me that was my heritage.

When I was probably 12 or 13 years old, Poo and Grandaddy came to our house in Springfield. I remember Grandaddy hugging me and saying that my face was getting fat. I was horrified! I know now that he was saying that I was getting older and maturing. He just kept apologizing to me and trying to explain what he meant. I feel bad to this day that I made him feel so bad.

When I got older she taught me to shave my toes. That’s right, one day she looked down at my toes and said, “Oh, you have my hairy toes. You have to shave those when you shave your legs.” Can you imagine your Grandmother telling you such a thing? She also told me one night after dinner that we weren’t going to do the dishes. She said your grandfather is in the other room waiting for us and I think these dishes can wait for us instead of him. She gave me permission to not do dishes sometimes after dinner because there were other things or people waiting that were more important. I have always said a silent thank you to Poo for that, whenever dishes needed to wait instead of people.

When we lived in Dallas Poo would come and stay with me during the week. Your Dad was gone and I was home with you two little babies. She loved being there, as she never liked being alone. I would need to go to the grocery store and would ask her if she could watch you kids. She would say, “Of course!” But she didn’t want to stay at the house. I would pack you kids in the car and Poo and we would go to the grocery store. Poo would stay in the car with you two while I went in. Never mind that this was the summer it was over 100 degrees for 100 days in a row. I left the three of you and the air conditioner going and all was well.

Erica, she thought you had the heartiest laugh. She would say listen to that! She thought that Ashley was just beautiful. She would talk about how healthy she was. Ashley would nurse so vigorously that you could hear the “milk running down her back.” I don’t know why it is said that way but Poo said I was a cow just like her. She said we were made for nursing babies.

Erica, when you were about 3 months old, Uncle Tim came to see us in Colorado. I will never forget, he was sitting in the living room holding you and he said, “Becky, forgive me.” I said what, and he said you looked like Grandaddy. I said thank you because I had seen it too. When babies are born they change so much from day to day and you get glimpses of other people. I had seen Grandaddy before in you but never had anyone to confer with about this. I was thankful that Tim affirmed my thoughts. Grandaddy had been gone 7 years by then. He was kind of hunch backed and usually wore a cowboy hat. I wasn’t appalled that Tim could see Grandaddy in you, I was thrilled and we all knew how beautiful you were. When Poo would come to see us in Dallas you were 2 and not changing so much any more. We could no longer see Grandaddy in you, but she would look at you and say, I wish I could see Guy in her like you and Tim did.

She always talked about the day he died. They had gone shopping for a couch and had gone out to lunch afterwards. She told of how Grandaddy teased her for ordering pie. I can’t remember if it was coconut cream or banana cream. Anyway, she said he was the ‘cutest little booger’ she had ever seen. Grandaddy died later that day while resting on the couch while she was cooking dinner. We didn’t really realize how blessed he was to not suffer the way so many others have. It was just so hard to have him and in the blink of an eye he was gone.

One day when my Mother was visiting us in Grand Rapids, we were out shopping. We were having a great time. I said to Mother, “Do you miss your Mother?” She said, “I miss my Daddy.” “Everyday.” We all watched Poo suffer for a long time and knew the blessing it would be when she was gone. There was no preparation for Grandaddy. When Poo died she had been in bed in the nursing home for several years and, as happens in nursing homes, she didn’t have any shoes left. We decided to bury her without shoes, as she wouldn’t have wanted us to buy shoes just to bury her. We laughed thinking how Grandaddy would tease her – arriving in heaven, barefoot, to meet her Maker.

Poo and Grandaddy always had the most fun. They loved to Square Dance. Grandaddy eventually became a caller, but I can remember them all dressed up in their outfits. The picture on the back of this frame is of them Square Dancing. Find something that you and your partner like doing so you can do it together, be it dancing, playing cards, watching movies, or whatever. Find that something and have fun with it.

Uncle Danny wrote this about Poo and Grandaddy. Keep in mind that this happened 27 years after Grandaddy was gone.
“ In 1997, I had just recently moved to Wichita, KS. I was working for Coastal Oil Company at the time as a Vice President of Marketing. It was only by chance that one spring evening I ended up going to the local Convention Center, and introduced to the local Square Dancers. My Colleague had told me that Coastal was a big donor to this organization, and that she had for many years gone to the big "Jamboree's" downtown, but that she would be more than grateful, if I would fill in for her that night, as she already had other important plans. I said I would, and I'm certainly glad I did.
As I approached the Convention Center, at the front doors, were a man and lady sitting at a table with name badges, and a sign that said "check in here". The man was wearing a western shirt, with a western bow tie, slacks and boots, and one of those big belt buckles. The lady wore a very bright pink dress with fluffy sleeves, the dress came to her knees, where she wore a very large petticoat underneath. I remember, only once, when I was a young boy of seeing my Grandmother (Poo), and my Grandfather (Granddaddy), all dressed up for their own Square Dancing Jamboree's.
I introduced myself, and they introduced themselves, then the man went and got another couple, I believe their names were Bob and Sally. Turns out Bob and Sally were head of the local Square Dance Association. They began telling me how much they appreciate Coastal's support throughout the state of Kansas for the Association, and began telling me what they were going to do in tonight’s ceremony and "Jamboree".
I said my Grandfather and Grandmother were Square Dancers, and my Granddaddy was also a caller. The man said, "sure enough", what was your Grandfathers name? I said it was "Guy Gentry". Then Sally said, and "Sue Gentry" was his wife. I said yes, that was my Grandmother. Then Bob and Sally began telling me about Guy and Sue Gentry. He said Guy Gentry pioneered Square Dancing in many places, Kansas being one of them. Guy Gentry started the first Square Dancers Association in Kansas at Dodge City. That was the first one, then it moved on east and west from there, we have over fifty Associations now in the State of Kansas. There is over a thousand Square Dancers that will be here tonight. Then he said, "Guy Gentry is the one who started it all".
That night, will always remain in my mind, after all, I was only there by chance, and then meeting these fine folks who knew my Poo and Granddaddy. Here I was in my suit leading the Square Dancers out on the floor, then I was led on stage like some celebrity. Bob got up on the microphone, and introduced me as Guy Gentry's grandson, and began to tell the story of how Square Dancing started in the State of Kansas.
I told my colleague the next morning I had so much fun, that I volunteered to go the next year, she could make other plans. It turns out I went the next two years, and I had a lot of fun each time I went there. What a wonderful group of people, these Square Dancers, a legacy of my Grandfather. How odd I had this chance meeting. Do you think Granddaddy arranged this meeting?....sometimes I think he did!...God Bless him, and my Grandmother Poo!”

I remember Poo telling me that before Grandaddy died, Uncle Danny had sent him a letter from Vietnam. Pappy died July 3rd and Grandaddy died October 31st, 1970. Danny must have thought he needed to write Grandaddy, after all Pappy left quite quickly. Danny was in Vietnam and unable to come to Pappy’s funeral. Anyway, Poo said that Danny told Grandaddy that he was ‘a great man’. He said something to the effect of ‘he was the kind of man he hoped to be.’ When we were going through Mother’s pictures of all our family, I showed Rick a picture of Danny and Grandaddy. Rick said he always thought Danny was Grandaddy’s favorite. Isn’t life funny? Rick, who was basically an only child and had Poo and Grandaddy all to himself as his Mother and Daddy, should feel that way. I have to admit they had enough love for all of us though. I always thought I was the favorite.

Poo and Grandaddy were so much fun! Grandaddy always called my mother Bill. I don’t know why but that was his pet name for her. He and Poo taught my Mom and Dad how to Square Dance and Grandaddy also taught my dad sales after he got out of the newspaper business. Dad had decided he couldn’t make enough money in the newspaper business and so went into sales and worked for Grandaddy for a period of time. We moved away from Oklahoma City when I was 6, but my Grandparents (on both sides) were very much a part of our lives. They weren’t perfect; Poo had her own demons and was the most racist person I have ever known. Sometimes, it is hard to reconcile her vile comments with the person I loved so. But, she was a product of her time and her upbringing and unfortunately, people didn’t know better. (I hope she isn’t rolling over in her grave for me saying that.) Grandaddy never touched a drop of alcohol in his life. I think when Poo got older she would have a glass of Sherry, on occasion, with the bridge ladies in the afternoon. But, their fun was wholesome and happy and they enriched my life more than these words or any could ever explain. I loved them both tremendously and still miss them today.

Love,
Mom

Song Of The Week

This week's song is dedicated to my Grandmother "Poo", who just loved this song so much, she cried each time she heard it. By the Everly Brothers called "Cathy's Clown".

Don't want your love any more.
Don't want your kisses, that's for sure.
I die each time I hear this sound
Here he comes, that's Cathy's clown.
I've got to stand tall.You know a man can't crawl.
For when he knows you're telling lies
And he hears them passing by,He's not a man at all.
Don't want your love any more.
Don't want your kisses, that's for sure.
I die each time I hear this sound,
Here he comes, that's Cathy's clown.
When you see me shed a tear,
And you know that it's sincere,
Don't you think it's kind of sad
That you're treating me so bad?
Or don't you even care?
Don't want your love any more.
Don't want your kisses , that's for sure.
I die each time I hear this sound
Here he comes, that's Cathy's clown.

Have a Good Week
Daniel